Monday, September 14, 2009

500

I didn't even notice that on Saturday was my 500th post. I would have made it a better post if had known instead of my lame cleaning one.

I've been doing a lot of reflecting on what I want in life, where I fit in, how to overcome my feelings toward myself etc. But as I started to type I looked down at my youngest and he flashes me a smile and it clicks for me. I have 3 amazing children who light up my life. I want the world for them, they accept me for who I am so I don't have to try to fit in with them and they don't look at me and think man my mom needs to lose some weight etc. They love me for me. It's amazing what a smile or an I love you can do. Why has it taken me till this very moment over the last few weeks to realize it? I don't know but I'm glad Spencer and I are having a moment to ourselves. Don't get me wrong it will take time for me to truly be comfortable with me but I'm on my way. And I must say the little I love you from Spencer is so darn cute you just can't be sad.

So if you are ever feeling the same way just take a step back and look for that smile.

2 comments:

k said...

Can you send us all a picture of the smile so that we can have an instant pick me up? :)

Desiree said...

Maybe it's just something in the air, or plain old human nature (which is messed up) for why we feel this way. I feel like I am in such a funk lately and have no reason to be. Thanks for your post, to remind us all what we have to be grateful for.